Friday, July 31, 2009 @ 8:30 PM
did you forget that i was even alive?
its friday!yes,at last.
had english prelim oral today.
was fun as i played a fun game introduced by denyce.
had fun with surya,loh loh,marcus,denyce,zhiyi and ben.
HHAHA. :D
thn chatted here and there.
then was my turn.^^
was kinda scary but i think i was okay.
i have no idea.
which is always the worst part.
hais.
there is a barbeque tomorrow and im wondering if i should go.
i seem to be doing so many things nowadays that i dont have
enough time to study,thats how i feel that is.damn.but i would
soon!night-study is coming and im going to study there,thats for
sure!
i dont know if i can actually be my normal self again.i hate it when
that particular teacher keeps throwing darts at people who cant do
amaths.that doesnt mean i have nothing in my brain,does it?just because
i cant get it,and yes,not putting in my 100% effort,doesnt mean i cant
do it?people have been asking me not to do it,but i have no idea.
thats the bloody asshole problem.
cant seem to make decisions.
and i dont want to regret.
it has happened before.
p4,i was stuck in situation where i had to choose if i wanted to take
higher-mother tongue.
what i chose?NO.
and now,im regretting.
sec2,i was stuck on whether to chose home econs or bio.
what i chose?BIO.
cant say im regretting,but cant say im aceing in it either.
thats the problem with me!
i cant seem to make any proper decisions before thinking so much!
and i hate it when i think because my mind is like a damn mindmap
where it branches out to everything,god knows what!gaaaahhhh!
i realise i have a phobia of pain,rejection and regretting.
damnation.
i have no idea what im blogging about because i just needed to let it out.
and i want someone to help me,anyone!
and thank you madhavi,
for teaching me amaths.
it meant alot to me.
ps/
on a lighter note,
i did something super brave today!
cant believe i did it though.
*clap hands.
" happy birthday! "
HAHAHAHAHHA.
i have no idea how old you are though.
AHAHHAHA.
damn funny.-.-
im confused.
should i go the barbeque??!?!
damn it lah,
cant even make a simple decision!
aiyoooo!
pps/ i seriously dont like you anymore.if only my stubborn heart agrees.
whenever i see you,i feel the pain.
Labels: fall even more in love.
Thursday, July 30, 2009 @ 9:02 PM
only i know you like the back of my hand.
i was in a very good mood to blog.but i lost it once i realised something.
really pushed me off the limit.
and im so stressed,seriously.
cant seem to do anything right nowadays.
at least there are some people who care.
thats enough to make me smile like marcus
who sings horribly,but still made me smile!
HAHAHHAH.
i cant seem to make any decisions also.
i am not sure if i should say yes?
i am not sure if i am making the right decision?
i am not sure if its the right time?
i am not sure if i would regret or not?
i am not sure if im doing the right thing?
i am not sure if i am sure of anything!
damnation bull,man!
ps/gosh.stop being a follower.start up your new trend or smth.
why?COS ITS FUCKING PISSING ME OFF.
AND.
YOU TALK.
BUT YOU DONT DO IT.
SO,WHY SHOULD OTHERS?
AND,I MIGHT LOVE YOU BACK.
I THINK.
I HAVE NO IDEA.
how do you know if you are making the right decisions
when you never had the feeling of satisfaction from
making all the others?
Monday, July 27, 2009 @ 8:52 PM
when you look me in the eyes,
hello people!what a monday.-.-
had normal school hours.
boring.
and then,had physics ect.
and it super sucked.
i guess its my fate to never be seriously happy
after a damned physics paper.
HAHAHHAHA.
oh god.
hopefully i just pass or something.
hopefully i will be happy.
oh well.
vinothini-
takecareeeeeeeee.
nothing will happen to u,
and u will be as strong as a horse soon!
must hang outttttt.
i miss youuuuuuuuuuu! :D
whoopie,
ben/bryan have returned to school.
happy that everyone is healthy.
and last but not least,
hui weilin.
happy 16th birthday.
i love you.
and though i feel you have changed,
due to some stuff,i will always be there
for you.dont worry about anything,if u
ever need to talk,just call me,and i would
be there,just to listen to you.
im sorry if i havent been hanging out with u
lately,but friendship doesnt require close
distance,baby!dont worry about anything aiights,
boys suck.remember man,and i/munting/cassie will
be there,always.
takecare,babe.
and enjoy your special day!
love youuuuuu. :D
ps/i wanted to make it special with ur photo and everything,
BUT DAMNNNNNATION BLOGGER IS HAVING PROBLEMS.AGAIN.
whatever it is,
enjoy you day,lovely!
i cant wait for the weekends.
Saturday, July 25, 2009 @ 8:29 PM
pretending,when the fuck is it going to end?
i hate you.i hate you for everything you have lied about.
i hate you for everything you did.
i hate you for pretending.
i hate you for saying that you loved me,
but you didnt.
and i f____king hate ur attitude,man!
pissing me off.
damn you.
Labels: where shall i go?
Friday, July 24, 2009 @ 6:07 PM
take my hand,and take a breath.
beautiful lies.but a broken heart.
myabe,you are not worthy anymore,
or it might be me,
not worthy of you anymore.
I throw all of your stuff away
Then I clear you our of my head
I tear you out of my heart
And ignore all your messages
I tell everyone we got through
Because I’m so much better without you
But it's just another pretty lie cause I break down
Every time you come around.
So how do you get here under my skin
I swore that I’d never let you back in
Should of known better
Been trying let you go cause here we go.
Hard as I try I know I cant quit
Something about you is so addicting
We’re falling together
You think that by now I know cause here we go once again.
You never know what you want
And you never say what you mean
But I start to go insane
Every time that you look at me
You only hear half of what I say
And you’re always showing up too late
And I know that I should say good bye, but it’s no use
Can’t be with or without you.
Again..
and again,
and again,
and again,
and again,
and again…
damn.
):
one of those days where its time to let it all out.
Labels: hello perfect.
Thursday, July 23, 2009 @ 9:22 PM
LOH LOH.
LOH LOH ACTING CUTE IN CLASS LEHH!HAHAH.
AND HER BEAUTIFUL PHOTO,TSKTSK.
EVERY NIGHT I LOOK AT IT,AND GO TO SLEEP.
HAHAHAHHAHA.
(:
LOH LOH IS THE BEST !
Labels: LOH LOH.
Wednesday, July 22, 2009 @ 7:11 PM
its alright,its okay.
mt listening compre was just okay.hope i didnt get more than 2 wrong.
i am sure everyone would do well.
vinothini,
get well soon babe!
miss talking shit with you.
and YOUUUUU,
bloody bitch.
seriously spoil my mood for the whole day.
asshole,go fuck him if you want.
dont show it off to me!
gaaaahhh.
i practically had to sleep just to cool myself down.
-.-
irritating attitude sia!
seriously.
and yes,im not over you.
how pathetic.
Labels: a little too not over you.
Tuesday, July 21, 2009 @ 9:33 PM
mundane?
#1.racial harmony day was awesome,(not every part,but it was fun!)#2.i have a strong feeling im going to flop my ect.AGAIN.*history repeats.
#3.i am going to scream out loud if i ever see you and her talk about me again.
#4.i love my class.
#5.mt listening compre is tmrw.freaking out.*bites fingernails.
#6.homework/stress is killing me.
#7.save up money for,*cough,*cough.HAHAHA.
#8.seeing the cute english...*ahem,excites me.
#9.benedict,get well soon!dont worry,nth will happen!
#10.congratulations salihan on winning the grss idol! i knew u can do it!
#11.im deeply hurt.
#12.i seem to be growing fatter.
#13.i miss the dumb-ass,parthiban.
#14.i cant seem to make up my mind.
#15.im not okay.
good luck 4e1 on ur mt listening compre!
take care ben!
congrats salihan!!! :D
ps/ good nights,shamimah.
-.-
Labels: school.-.-
Tuesday, July 14, 2009 @ 7:09 PM
walk the final journey alone.
damn.hating everything.
i cant wait for everything to be over and done with.
waiting for everything to crash and fall.
cant wait.*bitch smile.
parthiban,
UPDATEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE.
*smiles.
disgusting.
horribly.
if u cant,means u cant.
dont try.
i can see through it.-.-
Labels: best damn thing.
Monday, July 6, 2009 @ 8:45 PM
short term memory lapses.
before i forget,happy birthday hisham!!!!!!
thanks for everything,friend.
miss chatting with you!
enjoy ur day! :D
Labels: happy birthday
@ 8:40 PM
stupid.
i feel so down.i feel so sad.
i feel so fucked up.
i feel so sick.
i feel like dying.
and,i seriously am,
damn fucking(x100) times stupid.
seriously.
fucked up life.
p/s, if you dont realise it,you exaggerate so much.
its super irritating.damn.
and yey,parthiban come back liaos!
miss u lah deh!
come see me soon.
i have stories of
HAHHAHA.
im feeling extra stupid now.
i dont know why.i almost felt like burning
all my bks away.just cant seem to study.
feel like crying and cutting myself.
scold me all you want.
you fucking dont care.
Labels: irritating asshole/
Sunday, July 5, 2009 @ 6:18 PM
fucked up world.
im done.stupid oral.stupid teacher.stupid tongue.stupid mouth.stupid speech.
stupid pronounciation.stupid MOE.stupid olevels.stupid tears.stupid
life.stupid me.
im sinking,once again.
feeling so down.
and,i have fever
because,
of some stupid thing i did.
i wonder.
why am i studying?
when i have no brains to?
even if i have,
why cant i seem to put it to use?
why aint i doing well?
why am i always letting myself down?
why do i always cry?
why am i never happy with my results?
why do i always feel stupid?
why do i always see failures?
why do i never taste success?
im sure the rest will do well.
im fucking sure i wont.
stupid me.*slaps myself hard.
sick.
cant fetch my parthiban from airport.
sad life.-.-
i was so full of hope.
but,it didnt help.
so whats the point of,
believing?
Labels: oral is bullshit.
Wednesday, July 1, 2009 @ 9:44 PM
if only promises could be kept.
olevel oral tomorrow.freaking out.
hopefully,i can do it.
i usually have no hope,but i will have now
because i am "motivated" by marcus sng.
scared.
*cross fingers and pray hard.
i can do it,can i?
GOOD LUCK TO EVERYONE TAKING THE MOTHER TONGUE O'LEVELS ORAL!
MUST DO WELL OKAYY!DEFINETE CAN...IM SURE OUR CLASS WOULD DO WELL.
GOOD LUCK PEOPLEEEEEE.
ON A SPECIAL NOTE,
TO MARCUS,
u better get B4 or above okay.
you definete can one..
think of the $$!!!
ahahha.
and eh,i motivate u,so i expect 25%..
hahahahhaah.
good luck!!!! :D
TO SURYA,
you can do it.
im sure.
i have faith.
you should have it too.
dont worry too much.
TO MADHAVI,
im sure you can do it as well.
i have confidence in you.
you can.
TO YUNKHIM,
u better talk okay!!
must get A or B.
you can one lahhhh.
im sureeeee.
to the REST,
i dont know ur weaknesses,
but i wish you guys my heartfelt wishes.
we are as one,
and dont fail ur mother tongue,people.
we can do it.
*grins.
