I'm lost in your eyes and i cant find my way back.

Saturday, December 20, 2008 @ 1:13 PM

ive stop believing,but doesnt mean i wouldnt want it to happen.

sometimes i feel
i am not worth it.
not worth of
any single thing.
i feel like
i am a failure.
i want everything in life
but i get nothing at all
and i become a nobody.
i lost so many things
in life that i wish i could
get back.again,im saying why
cant i be the person i want
to be.

people say god wont give you anything you wont handle.

what makes god think i can possibly
handle it?my size?or do i think too
much?whatever it is,i cant handle it.
because,it aint me.whoever im portraying,
it isnt me.i feel the ache in my head,
heart and throughout my life.

why is god so unfair?
i ask myself that question every day.
why do some people get everything
they never really asked for,but me,
i dont get anything for whatever i
have always wanted.

its like believing there is santa,
when he really isnt there.

someone once told me,

"HE would be fair to everyone.patience."

oh really?why was i choosen not to
be who i want to be?why did i lose
everything?why did i lost my 2 yrs
best friends when i came sec 3?why
do i always lose my love and settle
myself for pain-filled heartbreaks?
why is it that whoever i trust
doesnt seem to be trustable after a
certain incident?whay do i do so
badly for exams and portrayed(to myself)
as someone dumb?why me?

when will god be fair?
when i die?
which is bloody when?
in my other lifetime?
or is it my fate?
my fate that i am meant to be like this.

failure.

again,

sometimes,

i think too much.

because all i want,

is a moment
that some people wait for a lifetime
and they search for it forever.

& that some people is me.

all i want is something
no one could possible give.

Labels: if all is meant to be.

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